Wedding season is in full swing and while these events are joyful occasions, they can present budgetary challenges for those with multiple friends or family members walking down the aisle. Declining a wedding invitation is uncomfortable and nearly impossible if the event is for someone with whom you’re close. However, going into debt or using up your vacation days for another person’s nuptials is a challenge to justify, especially if you’re working toward financial goals.
[See: 12 Ways to Be a More Mindful Spender.]
There are a few instances in which saying “no” to a wedding invite is quite reasonable. If the invitation caught you by surprise, it’s one you can safely decline since your absence won’t be noticed if you’re not close enough to the couple to anticipate being included in the event. You can similarly decline invitations from friends with whom you were once close, but haven’t seen in years. Destination weddings are typically cost-prohibitive and reserved for only those closest to the couple, so if this isn’t you, a “no” is not only acceptable, it’s likely expected.
In other cases, however, saying “no” requires a bit more finesse. Here are two low-cost alternatives to attending a wedding.
Send a gift in place of yourself. If you’re on a tight budget, and the wedding is for someone you care deeply about, send a gift in place of yourself. Wedding etiquette suggests couples shouldn’t expect gifts from people who decline their invitation, but the gesture is an affordable way to show you care about their milestone. You should also let them know as soon as possible that you can’t attend, especially in response to a save-the-date notice. This helps the couple save money on a formal wedding invitation you already plan to decline.
[See: 11 Money Tips for Women.]
Host a dinner in honor of the couple. Instead of attending the couple’s wedding, make plans to host dinner for them before or after the event. The least expensive option is to invite them for a home-cooked meal, but if that’s not your specialty, treat them to their favorite restaurant. Planning this event in advance means you can budget for the expense and make it truly special.
These alternatives work in some cases, but responding “no” to a wedding invitation is not always possible since members of your family and close friends will include you in their events at some point. Declining these invites can lead to hurt feelings and problems within relationships that are important to you. Instead of risking your relationship, consider these ways to reduce your cost of attendance.
Book airfare as soon as possible. If you know you’ll be attending a wedding, start pricing airfare when you receive confirmation of the wedding date. You can use Google Flights to track prices of your preferred itinerary and receive an email notification when the price becomes optimal. If you book with Southwest Airlines, you can receive a credit if your itinerary drops in price after your purchase. This requires tracking your purchased itinerary and re-booking the same flight to receive the refund, but it provides peace of mind that you’re getting the best deal.
[See: 7 Signs Your Romantic Partner Is Financially Unstable.]
Consider lodging alternatives. When couples book a block of rooms with a hotel at or near their ceremony location, they’re given a discounted rate, which guests can use to book accommodations. This rate can be less than what guests will find on their own, but the hotel itself may be pricier than those located nearby. This is especially true if the ceremony is being hosted at the hotel, as these venues are typically higher cost since they have the capacity to host a formal event.
Once you find out the discounted rate offered by the couple, compare prices at nearby lodging options. For example, your budget might be better suited to booking a room through Airbnb or sharing the cost of a vacation home with friends and family members. If the event takes place in a tourist destination, there are likely several hotels to choose from, including more economical options than the one hosting the event itself. As you compare costs, keep in mind any perks that may come with booking the guest rate at the couple’s hotel, including free shuttles to the ceremony and/or reception venue.
Compare prices on registered items. Before you buy a gift from the couple’s registry, research the item you want to purchase to ensure that you’re getting the best deal. Since many couples register at Amazon, Target, Macy’s and other stores that offer similar products, it’s important to determine that what you’re paying is the lowest price. Some browser extensions can make the process of comparing prices and finding coupon codes much easier. Honey, for example, automatically applies coupon codes to your order, while InvisibleHand will notify you when something you’re shopping for is cheaper elsewhere. The Camelizer is a browser extension for Amazon, offering price histories and price-drop notifications for Amazon products.
If you find a better deal, contact the couple to let them know what you purchased, so they can remove it from their registry.
Skip attire upgrades. Unless you’re part of the wedding party, avoid wasting your budget on the cost of a new dress or outfit for the event. You likely have something in your closet that you can wear without the stress and cost associated with finding something new. The money you might have used toward a new outfit can go toward other, more necessary expenses, like a wedding gift.
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How to Survive Wedding Season on a Tight Budget originally appeared on usnews.com